When God first told me about making and selling flags for a living, it was in July of 2014. so those who are thinking I’m rushing into this are wrong, but as the time grew closer for me to officially start “Flames of Glory,” fear and doubt grew closer, too, until a little over a week ago.
Thinking about starting a business would overwhelm me to the point of tears. This wasn’t a “good” overwhelming; this was very much bad. I had so much doubt and fear that it almost paralyzed me.
When you think about it, each new day is the first day of the rest of your life, but yesterday seemed extra special to me, and since I’m not sure how to explain it in a few words, I’ll take you through the majority of my day.
I had asked for yesterday off for a purpose: to start a business. Continue reading →
My weekend with God was amazing! At first, I was fasting, but when I woke up Saturday morning, God told me, “I want to spoil you. I want you to eat.” My first thought was, “I wonder if breakfast is still going on.” My second thought was, “Of course it is! You just invited me to eat.” Breakfast was being served, and it was super yummy.
This was the most restful retreat ever! I constantly had my soaking music playing. I prayed, read, wrote, slept, and ate…in that order every time. One of the things I had prayed for and studied into was a revelation of the power and authority I am able to walk in. I had just read Luke 9:1 and was getting ready to read chapter eight, when I went to eat dinner.
As I sat down with my dinner on Saturday evening, I met a couple of gentlemen who sat at the same table with me. (There were a couple of youth and college retreats going on.) In conversation, we found out that we (one of the men and I) were both leaders and started talking about leadership. When he found out about JC’s Girls, he was amazed.
This past year, I’ve learned to only share about my past when led by the Holy Ghost. This was one of those times. I began sharing about what God had brought me out of: the stripping, the selling my body, etc.,…he was amazed. I then shared with him about what purity meant to me, that – even though I’ve slept with over one hundred men – I don’t want to be kissed until my wedding day. He just marveled. (I offered to come and speak to his college group about purity. That would be cool.)
As he listened to me share, he said, “Wow! A modern day Mary Magdalene…you don’t see that very often, when someone with your past gets totally freed.” I shared with him about dancing with flags, what God has redeemed through that, showed them both the flags, and gave him my card. He said, “What a powerful ministry: Mary Magdalene Ministries. Thank you for sharing your testimony. That’s power! I’m going to be speaking about you.”
They left, and I sat there and cried. What God has done with me is amazing! The reason there is power in my testimony is because I know my identity. Nothing form my past will ever stop me from walking in who I am. Actually, I speak of “a” past, but it’s not “my” past. My past was buried forever. Every day, I’m creating a new past, and it’s glorious!
I went back to my room to read up on Mary Magdalene. Guess where you can find her? Luke 8, the very chapter I was about to read!! I cried some more.
On Sunday morning, that same gentleman asked if he could continue using my testimony. I told him he could use me forever.
I have a lot of “favorites” in the Bible. If you know me, you’ve heard me say, “That’s my favorite book” or “That’s my favorite Scripture.” The truth is, it’s ALL my favorite because God spoke it. But from the moment I first read Psalm 139, it has been my favorite…for real. It described how I wanted to feel about myself. In it, God would describe my beauty, how I was meant to look, how I was marvelous, but I would cry out to Him because I didn’t feel any of that. How could I be marvelous when _________? That would be the response in my mind (and sometimes aloud). I would pray that I would believe it someday.
Part of the power of worshiping with flags for me is that it reveals my beauty. Because of my past, I haven’t felt beautiful. What I’m discovering is that beauty isn’t a feeling. Beauty is known in your heart, but it almost seems like God gave me a ‘feeling’ to penetrate into my heart, so when I first danced with a flag, I ‘felt’ His heat (probably His consuming fire) flowing through me, melting every stronghold I had of ugliness. Since then, my heart has been open to His Truth. When His Truth became my reality, I was able to see beauty in my reflection. My eye is the lamp to my soul, so depending on what my soul believes is what I’ll see. I now know in my heart that I am beautiful.
Anyway, a friend gave me a special flag the other day, a beautiful iridescent one. It’s gorgeous…so gorgeous that the desire of my heart was to worship with it at Sunset Cliffs, so on Friday morning (8/8/14), before work, I went to Sunset Cliffs. On my way there, I felt like I was on my way to a date with God. I was worshiping, crying, believing. It was beautiful! My desire was to fly this flag to God’s breath on my life, and that’s what I did. I thanked Him so much for who I am in Him. In the past, I read this book, and it explained how when you see something beautiful, it’s God reminding you of how beautiful you are to Him. As I was worshiping Him, I was watching this flag, admiring its beauty, and I had the revelation that God was admiring me and my beauty. These flags reflect my beauty. That’s why they are so empowering to me. God is working through them in a mighty way.
When I was done, I sat in the car and was drawn to Psalm 139. I only read verses one through six. After each verse, I would stop and pray, thanking God that that was a truth in my life…so powerful! I was weeping because, finally, this Truth of His was my reality. Right now, I’m only able to read and pray each verse, but I can’t wait until I get to the part where He talks about how I was formed and how marvelous I am. Now that I believe it, I can’t even imagine the impact it will have.
We are all beautiful, handsome, gorgeous creatures. His word created us, saved us, and will keep us for eternity. How awesome is that!
(I didn’t have my phone to take a picture of where I was at, but I found the below picture online. If you look at the cliff on the left-hand side, that’s the idea of where I was standing, worshiping God with this beautiful, iridescent flag.)
Flames of Glory are swing worship flags the release the anointing of God’s Glory. While worshiping with them, I’ve experienced tremendous breakthrough. His Glory is my limit…endless!
Worship Flags and Infinity Scarfs 