“Happy Endings”

she lives her life in light
glancing at the darkness behind her

if she never shares where she’s been
they’ll never know where she’s come from
what God’s brought her through

living can be as simple as sharing
sharing can be as simple as living

boldness comes through the piercing of the heart
with the love of heaven striking through

love
not sex
but love

God is love
love is God

how long had she been confused?
years and years
tormenting her body
her heart
her mind

but one moment in time
changed the course she was on
and slowly but surely
it developed

a relationship with Him
living in Him
for Him
to Him

HE’s the one who wooed her to church
HE’s the one who listened to her prayers
it was HIM who led her to AA
through the steps
clearing the way for HIM
to enter in entirely

and all along the way
as she made mistakes
He waited lovingly with arms opened wide
embracing her as she returned
loving her deeply through it all

why?
why did God put up with her? she wondered
and in gentle moments He explained

“I know what the ending looks like” He said
“who you are isn’t who you’ll be”

THAT keeps Him patient
THAT keeps Him constant
THAT keeps her holding on
for what she’ll truly be

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Be Vulnerable!

Do you know a reason why relationships are important? Because we have the opportunity to LEARN from each other’s mistakes, and the good thing about learning from other people’s mistakes is that the consequences don’t affect you.

I can’t even tell you how many girls come into the treatment center with the thought of stripping for a living, and then they hear my story and change their minds. Do you know how powerful that is!

We have the power to change people’s minds from losing their lives to darkness!

Never be afraid to be vulnerable and share where you’ve been because it might save someone’s life around you. Not everybody will live through the pain you’ve endured.

Experience, Strength, and Hope

Last night, I had a BLAST speaking at the recovery meeting!

Every time I share my story, I never know what’s going to happen because I leave that up to God. I don’t plan anything; I just show up, open my mouth, and let His Spirit flow through me, and in the end, I hope that “someone” was touched by His words, and at the end of the meeting last night, I met who that someone was.

About twenty minutes before the meeting, a woman from the East Coast had made the last minute decision to go. She believes her recent trip to Harlingen, a drive over 1800 miles long, was to hear God speak through me at that meeting. What an honor is that! I just love the extreme God goes to to chase after “the one.”

When I think about what I shared, it was all about God. I talked about the mess I was without Him, my seeking Him for the kids, my finding Him, and my walking through Him in recovery. It was amazing!

My life is not my own.

If my life was my own, I’d be mourning my mother every moment of every day, but I don’t. I stay focused on Him and the life I’m leading and let the grief come and go wave by wave, and let me tell you: it comes at the weirdest times.

Last night, after the meeting, some friends came over for Carolyn’s yummy spaghetti, and after we ate, a few of us went to a late night showing of “Avengers: Infinity War.”

During one of the scenes where they were fighting, I had a vision of my mom when she’d kissed me in the hospital bed a bunch of times (without her teeth). Is that not the strangest timing for me to remember her! Anyway, another weird thing happened in that movie theater.

I’m a crier at movies…very emotional (at the drop of a hat), but last night was “different.”

As sad parts happened and I heard sniffles all around me, I sat there stone-cold…no emotion, and I wondered if it was because real death was so near me that fake death seemed far away. I don’t know. All I know is that not one scene affected me emotionally.

If I really want to know where I stand with that, I guess could watch a tearjerker and see what happens, but it’s not that important to me. I’m just very grateful for last night: the speaking; the yummy food; the fellowship; and the movie with friends.

THAT’s what recovery’s about, and that’s what living’s all about, too!

RECOVERY JOKES!!

[Last night, I shared about when I was an alcoholic, was using meth, and was selling my body. Then, I told THIS joke!]

There’s an alcoholic, a meth user, and a prostitute in the car. Who’s driving?
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*
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The Police!



A group of drinking buddies went deer hunting. They split up into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter came staggering back to camp alone, half-bombed and dragging an eight-point buck.

The others said, “Where’s Harry?”

“Oh, he passed out, a couple miles back up the trail.”

“What? You left Harry lying out there alone and carried the deer back?”

“A tough call,” admitted the marksman, “but I figured, who’s gonna steal Harry?”



An old-timer comes home from his home group meeting, gets ready for bed, and is on his knees saying his evening prayers.

He’s in the middle of his “God blesses” saying “God bless the guy who says the same thing no matter what the topic, God bless George, God bless the ‘cake lady,’ God bless . . . ” suddenly he pauses and looks up.

Then says, “You know God. I wonder if there is AA in heaven. If there isn’t AA in heaven, I don’t know if I want to go there. These folks are so important to me, I don’t want to spend eternity without them.”

There’s a bolt of lightening and a loud clap of thunder and then the old timer hears a voice saying, “I have good news and bad news.
The good news is, there IS AA in heaven.
The bad news is, “You’re speaking tomorrow night.”



Why aren’t people in recovery good dancers?
*
*
*
They lose interest after twelve steps.



“Alcohol Warnings”

Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the FDA’s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you’re whispering when you’re not.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.



[Okay, this one will (probably) only make sense to those who’ve read the big book. Trust me: it’s HILARIOUS!!]

A girl working with her sponsor asked “Where can I read about my sex problems?”

Sponsor said, “That’s covered on page 69.”

Later at home, the page number got jumbled. As she tried to remember, she turned to page 96 for her sex problems.

“Do not be discouraged if your prospect does not respond at once. Search out another alcoholic and try again. You are sure to find someone desperate enough to accept with eagerness what you offer. We find it a waste of time to keep chasing a man who cannot or will not work with you.”



 

Drum-roll, Please!!

It figures: I finally want to write, and it’s about something that requires anonymity, so I’ll be vague with as much detail as I can.

Last fall (sometime), there was a planning meeting for a big event that’d be going on on South Padre Island. Well, during that meeting, I committed to being the Entertainment Chair for the event. At that moment, I had all hope, but a couple months later, that hope dwindled. Continue reading

An Alarm for Thanks

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With all the stuff going on each day, it’s easy to forget to thank God, so yesterday, I had alarms to remind me.

You see, a few days ago, I heard a teaching about thanking God for one minute, seven times a day. Sounds easy, right?!

Well, the first two days, I totally forgot throughout the day, so Saturday night, I set seven alarms, and yesterday, before I knew it, a habit was formed.

In total, I must’ve thanked God for one minute over 12 times throughout the day, and my mind stayed set on good things! It was so amazing!! I’ll still set alarms each day, until it becomes a way of life.