Ever since my husband read my website…

I’ve had immense trouble writing. 😦

I’ve done a few poems and such but haven’t posted them here, but I will.

Writing has helped me through the toughest of times.

Now, I’m forced to change.

I’m not sure what “force” is doing the pushing though…doesn’t feel like God.

But, I’ve been wrong before.

“Creating Love”


this picture decribes my marriage
the light you see is hope

I blindly fell in love with him from a distance
through God’s heart
so when I came to live with him face to face
my eyes were opened to see

we had nothing in common
nothing to talk about
he had no goals for the kids
and treated me unkind

so love wasn’t an issue
it just wasn’t there
yet I’m married
so I’m here

and the more I get to know him
how it hurts to be married
nothing in common
nothing to talk about

but I’m here

marriage counseling
and faith
are what I’m using

to create a love
that might last through the dark


it’s not the fact that
darkness lies
darkness lies
it’s the fact that

at times

I believe them

but writing them down
seems to throw them
in fire
and all that’s left
is ashes

“Do You See What I See?”

I know you don’t
because when I look in the mirror
I cry

I see my profile
my weight
my self
and I cry

I just want someone
to see me
from the outside

each profile
from the neck down
from the neck up
from the front
the back
the sides
and tell me that
I’m beautiful

but convince me

or deliver me from
the darkness
that tells lies


can be good or bad
angelic or demonic
can weigh the scale
of decisions

but at times
you won’t know
which influenced you
until after
the choice’s been made

which may be too late

the point past no return
still has a panoramic view

The Quarterback

Last week, Nathan was able to join the football team and played two games. The way it works here…practice Mondays and Wednesdays…games Tuesdays and Thursdays. Well, on Thursday, Nathan got a touchdown, but it wasn’t a “smooth” one.

At first, he bobbled the ball but was able to hold onto it and juked past the defense for a touchdown. Of course, I didn’t get it on video but recorded it in my mind, and as the memory made it’s way to my heart, God spoke to it.

It was the next day, and as we were driving along, the thought came to me: what has God passed you lately…not just me but everyone?

Being married…moving to Texas…at first, I bobbled the ball but was able to hold onto it, and after “juking” some darkness…made a touchdown.

Now, I’m back in line, ready for His next pass!