have you ever been
afraid
to voice what your tears
really mean?
who would like
my burdens?
I’m willing to share
realizing the value
of time
knowing the absence
of presence
the F in
different
the A in
absent
the I in
intent
the T in
trust
the H in
hope
as life changes
so do definitions
of marriage
of family
of yoke
some words’ve
expounded
oppression
parenting
writing
as I write
I work
through
the issues
in my mind
what started
in chaos
ends
in perfect
peace
as a wife
a mother
a woman
and friend
I’ve experienced
a lot of
change
but one thing
remains
I am
a son
of God
in the past week
I’ve been
manipulated
lied to
lied about
ignored
judged
accused
all by people
who “claim”
to love God
all by people
whom I’ve called
friends
when I look at myself
some times
I see the past
some times
I see the present
the weight I’ve gained
the parts that are aging
the gray
but then I think of the kids
and what they see
they see the mother they looked to
while breastfeeding
they see the profile of the mommy
who used to burp them
they see the beauty of the one
who’s made them smile
they see the comforting arms
that’ve held them
they see the lap they used to lay on
while watching movies
they see the hands of the woman
who has led them
they see the eyes and the face
of who’s always loved them
age doesn’t stick out to them
because they’re aging too
and we’re still growing
as a family
in the soil of love
if you
live
by the
Truth
opinions
won’t
matter
-interfere in or busy oneself unduly with something that is not one’s concern.
-touch or handle (something) without permission.
on Monday
someone meddled
with my family
a “Christian”
with “good intentions”
left a path
of destruction
and chaos
disrupting minds
that were set
there was no warning
much like a tornado
there’s STILL debris
on the ground
my first response
was to vent
online
but instead
I continued on
in peace and quiet
and whatayaknow
God’s been at work
changing minds
and moods
to look more like
HIM
God reveals truth
and the enemy’s lies
one Man
in power
one cross
Love
poured out
in dying
Love
lived out
in rising
a life
time
to receive
yet
so many
turn away
one Love
to become
and win
for the one who lost a baby
newborn pictures will look different
for the one in an unhappy marriage
wedding photos will lack joy
for the one who lost their kids
family pictures may not form a smile
sometimes effects of experience
change one’s perspective
and the only way to change it back
is through alignment with Him
since leaving Lemon Grove
I’ve been oppressed
and let me tell you
the dark can get darker
along the road
many turned away
some remained silent
while others stood by
praying
hoping
holding
believing
many said
not to write
or at least
not out loud
but if they only knew
how many times
I held a pen
how many journals
were sent
and as I sat there
with pen in hand
only tears would
fall
when ink
becomes tears
pages become
warped
with every thing inside
I felt buried
with no where to express
parts died
but maybe they needed to
for other parts to live
when a forest burns
new life grows
because what once was shaded
now has light
to those who turned away
welcome back
to those who stayed
let’s move on
to those who were silent
I’m ready to listen
Worship Flags and Infinity Scarfs 