“Contentment”

you know what I’ve realized?
I’m normal for “me”
no one can walk through this
like I am
and I can’t walk through it
like anyone else

we’re all different
all
unique

I’m grateful for my ups and downs
because I’m learning to work through them
the challenge I have
is to “feel” without judging myself

easier said than done

my poor counselor
I feel like he keeps having to repeat himself
but it seems like in between seeing him
I forget
but today
he said I’m doing much better!

my walk is mine
my look is mine
my nature is mine
and I’m pretty happy with it

“Where I’m At”

I feel like everything I’m doing now
I was born to do

when I write
something happens inside
like a spiritual birth
every time
and I walk away renewed

when I dance
I feel like I’m moving in heaven
free of thought
free of life
free to be me

when I work with women
I feel like every trauma I’ve been through
is their hope
because I’m on the other side
I’m grateful for all that I’ve been through

as a mother
I’m rewarded every moment
of every day
thoughts of my kids and grand baby
fill my heart

when I work with silk
I really feel like I know what I’m doing
even as I learn
like it was meant for me to do
and meant for me to create

when I speak
I feel like people listen
like really listen
and when they walk away
they’ve held on to what they needed

when I laugh
love overflows
into everyone around me
and when I cry
I think the same thing happens

I feel like I was born to do
everything I’m doing now

“Creating Love”

20161108_220957

this picture decribes my marriage
the light you see is hope

I blindly fell in love with him from a distance
through God’s heart
so when I came to live with him face to face
my eyes were opened to see

we had nothing in common
nothing to talk about
he had no goals for the kids
and treated me unkind

so love wasn’t an issue
it just wasn’t there
yet I’m married
so I’m here

and the more I get to know him
how it hurts to be married
nothing in common
nothing to talk about

but I’m here

marriage counseling
effort
and faith
are what I’m using

to create a love
that might last through the dark

“Fortress”

over time I’ve learned
if someone hurts me
over and over again
I guard my heart
with an iron wall

so what if that someone
decides to change
will their niceness
even make it
over the wall

in turning the other cheek
over and over again
you end up shaking your head
“no”

Through the Eyes of Babes

Okay, so, when I say I’m “fine” being single, I really am FINE being single, but every once in awhile, thoughts of being married, having a ceremony, dancing, or the honeymoon will flash through my mind, and most of the time, those thoughts are good. Let me share with you my thoughts from yesterday. Continue reading