freedom

I got another job!

| Laura Lee Bonde

I say “another” job because making flags is my first job (although, not everyone in my life considers it one).

A few days ago, I started working as a Recovery Advocate at Origins, a treatment center on South Padre Island!

Sobriety

| Laura Lee Bonde

Yesterday, I was surprised that I never got around to writing about my sobriety, but then again, I wasn’t that surprised at all.

You see, there’s been a fear in me about writing: who can know; things aren’t perfect; how can I be honest without drowning others; how can I be transparent without exposing…the list of fears goes on and on, and that list has kept me from writing, but that’s letting fear control me, which isn’t who I am at all.

The moment I stepped into God, Continue reading →

“Trudging”

| Laura Lee Bonde

since leaving Lemon Grove
I’ve been oppressed
and let me tell you
the dark can get darker

along the road
many turned away
some remained silent
while others stood by

praying
hoping
holding
believing

many said
not to write
or at least
not out loud

but if they only knew
how many times
I held a pen
how many journals
were sent
and as I sat there
with pen in hand
only tears would
fall

when ink
becomes tears
pages become
warped

with every thing inside
I felt buried
with no where to express
parts died

but maybe they needed to
for other parts to live

when a forest burns
new life grows
because what once was shaded
now has light

to those who turned away
welcome back
to those who stayed
let’s move on
to those who were silent
I’m ready to listen

“The Waking Hour”

| Laura Lee Bonde

as I write
I feel
and as I feel
I write

not believing
what I feel
and not feeling
what I believe

even now
crying
not knowing where I am
not knowing where I’m going

I know there’s more
a deeper freedom residing
where I can be “me”
no matter who I’m around

that was the thing
to bring people joy
to change the atmosphere
and dream

but when every dream
becomes a nightmare
and every sleep
brings a disturbing dream

the problem lies in waking
not in sleeping

but there’s this Truth I know
woven into my heart
of being One with Him
and having hope

misery CAN’T be His plan
so I’ll fight where I stand
by letting Him lead
His way to goodness