“The Picnic Table”

last night
I had a dream
one on One
with God

He talked to me
about writing
and what it does
for people

He told me the benefits
of writing for others
and the difference
of only writing to Him

He finally asked me
“what’re you gonna DO about it?”
I woke up
wanting to write

I will never
forget this dream
especially since
I’m writing it down

He sees
what not writing does to me
and I see
how much He cares

Running Man

Since being sick earlier this week, I missed two days of running, so this morning, I wasn’t sure how I’d feel being back out there, but man, as soon as I started, I felt amazing!

Back in high school, even though I wasn’t very fast, I LOVED running. Then, through the my senior year, a lot of “life” happened, so my running stopped and, until last month, hadn’t started up again.

That’s (almost) THIRTY YEARS! Continue reading

“Conscience”

there’re some times
when I just feel damaged
I know it’s not true
that’s why I call it a feeling
but man
does it catch me offguard
and cause so many tears

who was I?
who am I?
is who I am caused by who I was?
is who I was covered by who I am?

listen to when I say
these are just moments
but as I was praying through this one
I felt called to write

since God hasn’t blessed me with NO memory
I’m stuck to deal with what comes my way
and this morning
as it was coming my way
I asked someone from my past
what was I like?
because honestly
I don’t remember much good

what comfort it brought me
to hear some good
but at the same time
I still felt damaged
but that’s when I trust
His word to wash my mind
as my tears wash my face

“A Song” or the beginning of one

through it all
You never lost my vision
through it all
You never left my side
through it all
You welcomed each beginning
through it all
You held my hand inside

how close is Your love
how strong is Your friendship
how bold is Your faith
to believe in me

how weak are my endings
how fragile is each beginning
but every step
You’re here with me

holding on
to everything You’ve done
holding on
to everything You’ve said
holding on
to truths I cannot see
holding on
to You who’s holding me

“Response Ability”

throughout life
you’ll encounter people
who may not know who they are
and as they speak to you
they’ll tear you down
with words looks and actions
but if you live your life through God’s heart
even as they tear you down
He’ll be rebuilding

it’s who He is
it’s what He does

and in every moment of pain
you’ll have the chance to decide
will you react in fear
or will you respond in love

“Another Holiday”

Happy Easter, Everyone!!
4/16/17

Easter
a day I thought I’d be a mess
without my boys
but last week
something changed
I realized there’s someOne
so much more important
than my kids
and that One is God

and when I focus on Him
my emotions don’t go crazy
when I focus on Him
my circumstances seem small
when I focus on Him
I see He’s the same

no matter where my kids live
no matter how my marriage’s going
no matter what’s going on
no matter who’s in front of me
no matter when life takes a turn
He stays the same

and when I focus on Him
my purpose is steadfast

17880301_10211734038934185_2824565055284155655_o

“The Power of One”

alone: all one
alone with God: all one with God

but there are other types of alone

like being alone in a relationship
like being alone at a movie
like being alone in Texas

when I moved from everything I knew
and everyone I’d known
I thought it wouldn’t affect me
but almost immediately
it did

moving from everything
to almost nothing

it took its toll on me
on my emotional stability
on my spiritual identity
and I was alone

yes I made friends along the way
but none believe what I do
and yes I was never alone
but in some ways I was

but being alone to walk through things
was empowering

to know that nothing is impossible for me

sometimes
you have to walk alone
sometimes
its better to walk alone
sometimes
it’s about being all one

please don’t be offended
this is simply my poem

I know so many pray and think good thoughts
but I’m talking about the times when I couldn’t breathe
the times my face swelled up from crying
the long drive back from dropping off Nathan
and many more

alone
finding power in the only Source I know
finding comfort in the only Blanket I know
finding peace in the only Man I know
alone

trust me
nothing is impossible for me
I’m invincible
because I live in victory

even when darkness closed in around me
my path was always lit

“Not By Sight”

I haven’t done this in awhile
eyes closed
heart open
writing a poem
without distraction

as my fingers dance among the keys
I focus to see who I am

I am HIS
a child of God
blooming in every season
just like
when the rain pours down on the flowers
they may look sad
and gloomy
drooping beneath the weight
of every drop
but as the sun comes out
the flowers stand
and dance in the wind

that’s how I feel

even if the weather takes it ts toll
I remain
even if my appearance changes
my heart stays the same
perfect in HIM
my Creator
my Lover
my Everlasting Hope
my Smile
my Life

who am I?
I am HIS

not an alcoholic
not a prostitute
not a drug addict
not a mother
not a wife

I am HIS
a child of God
a daughter of the King
a vessel of His Spirit
I am HIS

Drum-roll, Please!!

It figures: I finally want to write, and it’s about something that requires anonymity, so I’ll be vague with as much detail as I can.

Last fall (sometime), there was a planning meeting for a big event that’d be going on on South Padre Island. Well, during that meeting, I committed to being the Entertainment Chair for the event. At that moment, I had all hope, but a couple months later, that hope dwindled. Continue reading