Above the Barbed Wire Fence

Before I forget, I want to share with you a comical moment from my recent retreat. It didn’t happen “during” but on my way home.

After the official ending time of my retreat, I was invited to stay longer but felt compelled to leave after eating lunch. I figured it was so I could miss traffic, but God had planned something else. Continue reading

My Job as a Mother

So many wonderful things happened on my retreat, but many of them are for me and God to know and for you to never find out, but some of them will be shared (as time goes on), and one in particular came to mind tonight.

On my retreat, I met a young pastor, and at one point, I was telling him about when all I had to make for dinner was beans and rice and how Nathan reacted, and, ultimately, how I reacted. Do you remember? Continue reading

Bye for Now

I’m going on a retreat tomorrow but am going to start withdrawing now, so I won’t be writing for a few days.

Let me tell you about my retreat. I’m so excited!!

I’m going to a retreat center on Palomar Mountain. Normally, people go there in groups of hundreds. I like to go alone.

In the past, I’ve gone to another center, but this will be my first time at this one. Because I’m a leader, I get the “pastor’s special,”…all meals included. I won’t be taking anything electronic with me. My car’s been acting up, so I’ll take my phone, but hopefully, I won’t turn it on.

I’m excited: me, God, bibles, paper, pens, thoughts, imagination, conversation…

all alone…

all one with God.

A Modern Day Mary Magdalene

My weekend with God was amazing! At first, I was fasting, but when I woke up Saturday morning, God told me, “I want to spoil you. I want you to eat.” My first thought was, “I wonder if breakfast is still going on.” My second thought was, “Of course it is! You just invited me to eat.” Breakfast was being served, and it was super yummy.

This was the most restful retreat ever! I constantly had my soaking music playing. I prayed, read, wrote, slept, and ate…in that order every time. One of the things I had prayed for and studied into was a revelation of the power and authority I am able to walk in. I had just read Luke 9:1 and was getting ready to read chapter eight, when I went to eat dinner.

As I sat down with my dinner on Saturday evening, I met a couple of gentlemen who sat at the same table with me. (There were a couple of youth and college retreats going on.) In conversation, we found out that we (one of the men and I) were both leaders and started talking about leadership. When he found out about JC’s Girls, he was amazed.

This past year, I’ve learned to only share about my past when led by the Holy Ghost. This was one of those times. I began sharing about what God had brought me out of: the stripping, the selling my body, etc.,…he was amazed. I then shared with him about what purity meant to me, that – even though I’ve slept with over one hundred men – I don’t want to be kissed until my wedding day. He just marveled. (I offered to come and speak to his college group about purity. That would be cool.)

As he listened to me share, he said, “Wow! A modern day Mary Magdalene…you don’t see that very often, when someone with your past gets totally freed.” I shared with him about dancing with flags, what God has redeemed through that, showed them both the flags, and gave him my card. He said, “What a powerful ministry: Mary Magdalene Ministries. Thank you for sharing your testimony. That’s power! I’m going to be speaking about you.”

They left, and I sat there and cried. What God has done with me is amazing! The reason there is power in my testimony is because I know my identity. Nothing form my past will ever stop me from walking in who I am. Actually, I speak of “a” past, but it’s not “my” past. My past was buried forever. Every day, I’m creating a new past, and it’s glorious!

I went back to my room to read up on Mary Magdalene. Guess where you can find her? Luke 8, the very chapter I was about to read!! I cried some more.

On Sunday morning, that same gentleman asked if he could continue using my testimony. I told him he could use me forever.