Yesterday was too funny. In the morning, as I was packing lunch for me and Lee, at the last minute, I grabbed a bag of popcorn, figuring I’d pop it right before leaving for the park, so it would be warm. Good plan, huh? The Holy Spirit has the best plans, and they’d work great, if I’d follow them.

Work was getting in the way of me leaving for lunch, so I left a little late. As I walked up the hill from work, I realized I forgot to pop the popcorn, so I was taking a package of microwave popcorn kernels…no time to go back. I had cold pizza and sweets, so I continued on.

When I reached Lee, he started telling me about why he had to wake up early, abruptly…the police. They had startled him awake and told him not to go back to where he sleeps, so he didn’t know where he would go last night. He talked about recently praying about leaving Balboa Park anyway…maybe even San Diego all together. I told him, “Well, tomorrow, I’ll actually “pop” the popcorn and bring it. If you’re here, I’ll share it. If you’re not, I’ll eat it all by myself.”” He laughed.

He actually mentioned that, while at my house, he had wanted to pop a bag of popcorn but didn’t ask. See? The Holy Spirit was the one who told me to bring it. I love how God cares about the littlest details of our hearts, the smallest desires. Lee and I had a wonderful chat.

We laughed so hard. I tried to make a imprint in my mind of him laughing, so I’d remember it forever. He may not be there today. Yesterday, I walked away fine. It didn’t affect me at all. I walked away thinking if he’s not there, I’ll just follow the Holy Spirit to a new heart, but it DOES affect me because, as I’m typing this, tears are falling.

Lee is my friend, and when I love people, I love them deeply, so I can’t just walk away and forget. If he’s gone, I’ll probably sit and eat the popcorn mixed with tears. It he’s there, I’ll be excited and probably cry anyway (at times, I’m a crier). Maybe this title should be “Popcorn and Tears.” What do you think?

Anyway, this has been a good lesson for me. I’ve been praying about not wanting a husband. Why would I want to be with someone whom I might lose someday? Isn’t it better to just stay alone? These have been my questions to God, but He’s shown me that closeness is good; that, after a loss, the bond remains, so I’m going to live my life, meet people, create memories, and look back on a past I’m making with Christ. Friends are good and so valuable.

Intimacy isn’t sex. It took me a long time to learn that. Intimacy is sharing your heart with people in a real way. From experiencing intimacy with God, closeness with friends just happens because it flows from heaven into the hearts of those we love and creates a bond that lasts forever.