The other night, in the wee morning hours, I was dancing with my jumbo red flag, dancing with the King, listening to the words “waiting on You,” and had a moment of revelation that I wasn’t too fond of.

As I was dancing, I was pondering the fact that I’m waiting on God for a husband. At that moment, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a man head out toward the restrooms and began to cry.

I realized how, at times, I feel rejected, instead of protected…feel not pretty enough, instead of beautiful…feel not good enough, instead of waiting for God’s best, etc. It was so strange, so out of nowhere, so not the truth…something I needed to deal with.

I thought, “How do I wait on You for a husband and still feel beautiful, desirable, wanted?”

I continued dancing through my tears, through realizing that there was something that needed to be dealt with. In my mind and my heart, I told God, “I KNOW that I am beautiful to You. Why do I feel the need to have a husband tell me that, in order to believe it?”

Do you realize what was happening? My old self was speaking, and I was listening. That’s the way I USED to feel…I USED to live. That old nature is dead, so how did I resurrect it? I left the room with some tissue.

I sat in stillness and wept. In my time with God, there was realization, repentance, re-alignment. The only reason waiting had seemed so hard (for a moment) was because I looked at it through a worldly view. As humbling as it was, I was glad that God revealed that wrong mindset and directed me back to His path.

The beauty in waiting shines more gloriously than anything else on this earth. Waiting…listening…learning…becoming love…receiving all that God has for me…receiving His love. In the end (or the beginning), it will all be worth the wait!